๐Ÿ’— Living Heart:full

2019 in Review: A Year of Courage

They say you can do more in one year,
than in your entire life.

I know that for a fact, because I just did so this year. But before I tell you how, let me give you a bit of my backstory…

I have been living in fear, for most of my conscious life, of essentially everything. In short, I have been quite afraid to live. Never mind why or how I ended up like this. The point is, the moment finally dawned upon me on the winter’s eve of the new year. Out of sheer desperation, I resolved to make that day, the last day I live in fear.

“If not now, then when?!”… That is what struck me as bright as lightning in my darkest hour. Now you’re probably thinking how clichรฉ this phrase is, and how you’ve heard it a million times before. But out of all of these times, it only takes one time for it to truly sink in, fuse that unplugged connection between your mind and your heart, send a shiver down your spine and force you to take a cold, hard look at your life and what you’ve become, and more, what you’ve yet to become.

Then finally do something about it.

It was at that moment, that I started thinking to myself:

Until when was I going to label myself a victim of my childhood, circumstance or society?
Until when was I going to put my own goals on hold in the name of stability or the crushing demands of adulthood?
Until when was I going to burn myself out working on everybody else’s dreams but my own?
Will there ever come a day I will deem myself ready for what I want to embark on?
When was I going to become who I truly am and begin to manifest the unlived life within me?

It hit me right then and there, how I had deluded myself โ€”in the name of fear, stability or unworthiness (who do I think I am, anyways?)โ€” into just waiting: waiting for anything and everything to happen to me. This was not patience, but paralysis and passivity that I had found myself in.

Indeed, what a fine line and yet stark difference between them.

Fear no more.

That was the day I decided to change my inner narrative; to let go of all the mental baggage weighing me down all these years; to turn a new page, heck, to burn all the pages, and start everything anew.

I decided to look at myself with a fresh pair of eyes; to look not at my past, but my future; to accept and move past what I am now, then to look forward to what I can become. I will not presume what I think I can and cannot do. I will not deem myself unworthy of success.

Looking back for a moment, I am forever grateful for that day;
I could not have done myself a greater service.

In the days that followed, I began to plan what I envisioned the year ahead should look like, with this new outlook of mine. Luckily in my case, it was pretty straightforward. I looked at the big picture and came to identify the single driving force in my life: not living, out of fear, and decided to replace it with its polar opposite. I just needed to consciously change one word in my mental dictionary; I erased ‘fear’ and replaced it with ‘courage’.

Then declared it the theme of the year 2019.

But how, exactly?

Simply speaking, I just decided to do more of what mattered to me, not to adulthood, not to my parents, not to peer pressure and not to the rest of society. No matter the cost, consequence or resistance. No excuses. I kept reminding myself, “I will never be here again.”

I finally listened to the voice inside me that has been whispering into my ear ever since I came into consciousness;

“You were meant for more.”

I answered that inner call.
I listened to my gut intuition.
I silenced my inner critic.

I opened a mental door of possibility for myself; what if I lived experimentally for a year, without the shadowing doubt that often pulls me back from taking action?

And the rest is history… Just kidding!

Here’s what happened…

I must say, I surprised myself. What happened this year was way beyond anything I imagined or expected. Al hamd lellah first and foremost.

On the outside, I traveled to places I only ever dreamed of on my bucket list. I began learning a hobby I had wished to learn for almost ten years. I fearlessly jumped off a 2000 meter high mountain and paraglided over a scenic view I had only ever seen on Instagram to witness the beauty of nature from high above. I made new friendships and crossed paths with so many wonderful souls whom I will continue to cherish for as long as I remember. I initiated a passion project with my friends in order to work more on something we truly care about. I launched a support and accountability group to help fellow ladies work on their own goals and dreams.

On the inside, I gained more creative confidence in my artistic abilities and set up a creative workspace at home to cultivate a surrounding environment of self-expression. I honed my photography skills with over 10,000 photos taken during my travels. I broke so many mental barriers of fear that were accumulating over the years for all the wrong reasons. I traveled alone and explored new places with an adventurous spirit. I engaged in so many extroverted activities, tried things for the first time and rose up to the occasion! I took steps towards creating this blog and letting my voice finally be heard!

I can finally and gratefully say I have overcome fear with courage.

And it all began with that one fateful day one year ago. I’m sharing my story today to prove that if I can do this, so can you. I have no doubt about it. You can do more in one year than in your entire life.

It’s your turn. How was your year? What theme will you be setting for 2020? What is the one thing you need to do to turn your life around? Be as intentional as you can.

I hope your fateful day comes soon,
I hope you make it today!

Want a ready-made review and planning book for 2020? Check out this free booklet I found online called the Year Compass https://yearcompass.com/

  1. marammohamad Avatar

    WOW!๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ This post gives me so much positive energy and hope for a better future. Thank you for being brave and sharing your story it helps us remember that we can be brave as well! I would love to join the “support and accountability group to help fellow ladies work on their own goals and dreams” that you mentioned in your post. Keep Going we are rooting you on!๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช

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